You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
