some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
Randomize
