If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
Randomize
