We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Randomize
