I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
Randomize
