Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
he just fucked me for my cheese.
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
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