Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
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