are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
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