So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
Randomize
