Me too!
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
Randomize
