My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
Randomize
