Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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