ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
Randomize
