It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
Randomize
