working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
I'm determined to sit on that face.
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
Randomize
