My hair reeks of homosexuality.
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
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