If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
