CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Randomize
