i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
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