Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
So I have $4.22 in my bank account, just wrote a check for a tooth brush from quikmart, and bought a 25 cent condom from the bathroom. i don't know whats more sad, my bank account or the fact that i'm entrusting my entire future to a condom machine that was probably last filled in 1970
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
Randomize
