You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
actually, I'm a sock model
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize
