dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
Randomize
