No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
How drunk are you?
Completed.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
Randomize
