i barfeds in our rink
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize
