I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
Boobs are out for the taking
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
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