I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
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