Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Randomize