What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
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