They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
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