Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
You know you're getting old when you pick up hot sorority girls at the bar, and they write down their phone number, and under it 'we're great babysitters!'
Randomize
