That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
We need to get me chipped asap
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
Randomize