I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
Randomize
