My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
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