Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
So I'm dropping a fat deuce at work, and the lock on the stall door slips and the door slides open, when suddenly someone comes in. Now I have two options, I can either get up quickly and try to shut the door quickly (not easy to do with one hand) or I can just sit there and play it off like it's no big deal and I always dump at work with the door open. I chose option two, and it was as awkward as it sounds.
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
Can't talk, ducks in the car
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
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