After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
Did you just see the Batmobile???
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
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