Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
Listen man, there's two things I know about in life: porn and sound. On a day that I'm wearing khakis, I need you to trust that I know what the fuck I'm doing.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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