was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
Randomize
