Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
Randomize
