I don't think brook has ever known best
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
