Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
Randomize