In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
Randomize
