I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
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