Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize