Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
Randomize
