I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
Randomize
