help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
Dear sober self, your keys are on the table in front of you the only way your typing this is with autocorrect goodnight love you
Randomize
