so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
Randomize
