My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Randomize
