I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
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