Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
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