i barfeds in our rink
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
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